I miss her...

I miss her
I miss her smiles
I miss her hugs
I miss her grin when I was teasing
I miss our convos
& how she always listened
to every
single
heartache
I miss her hands
(squeezing mine)
I miss her shoulders
(just bony enough, yet soft enough for me to lay on)
I miss her fingers
(combing my hair & wiping my tears)
I miss how she knew just what I needed when I was sick
I miss sitting in comfortable silences while we both read books
I miss sneaking bagfuls of new books past dad's all-seeing eyes
I miss her 'hello's' when I walk through the front door
I miss seeing her on the front row at church
I miss calling her for advice
I miss just knowing she was in the room
I miss her in the morning
(when I wake up & remember)
I miss her in the middle of the day
(when I just want to hear her voice)
I miss her at night
(when the silences bear down with tears)
I miss her
I miss her
I miss her
I miss her in this jagged-edged hole in my heart
this wound that seems as raw & fresh as the first day
I just miss my mom.

6.22.16
kara